How assertive are you?

How do you think you'd fare on the assertiveness scale? Do you know how to get the most out of those around you? Don't know then why not try this revealing quiz by Everywoman and discover what you're really like!

This quiz features in “Assert Yourself” from the series of everywoman Simple Approach to business guides. Buy the book here... . So go on, give it a go and see how you get on. Why not let Womens Biz Network know the outcome atthe comments box?............

How often do you feel ‘put upon’ at work?
a) Regularly, but it is what I expect.
b) I generally feel in control of my workload.
c) Colleagues have finally realised that I am not to be imposed upon.

How do you feel when someone seeks your opinion?
a) Very grateful as it happens so rarely.
b) I feel happy that they value my judgments.
c) Colleagues usually know my opinions already—if they have to ask they weren’t listening!

You’re having a discussion with someone who isn’t giving you a chance to respond. What do you do?
a) Wait and listen. They may have something valuable to say.
b) Make eye contact and let my body language show I’m about to speak, before starting to make my point.
c) Talk louder than them—they’ll soon stop and listen!

If a colleague asks you to do something which you feel isn’t your responsibility, what do you do? a) Try to fit it in—it’s important to be as helpful as possible.
b) It may provide a useful learning experience, so try to fit it in, but make sure they know I’m doing them a favour.
c) Refuse—it’s their job and their responsibility.

How do you feel about other members of your team?
a) I worry that they don’t think much of me.
b) I respect their experience. We’re all on the same team.
c) I don’t think much of them, so try to avoid them so I can get on with my job.

A colleague stops by to chat but stays too long, preventing you from getting on with your work. What do you do?
a) Let them stay, and resign myself to staying late to finish.
b) Explain that I have a deadline to meet and suggest they return another time.
c) Tell them to stop bothering me—can’t they see I’m busy?

You suspect a colleague dislikes you, but aren’t sure why. How do you deal with this?
a) Pretend I’m unaware of their attitude and try my best to avoid them.
b) Talk to them to find out the reason for their aversion.
c) Be confrontational in my dealings with them so that next time they will think twice about being haughty.

How did you score? Now add up your scores.
a = 1
b = 2
c = 3

5–10: You’re at the passive end of the assertiveness scale, and if you’re not careful you’ll end up being taken for granted which will make you very unhappy. Assertiveness is not simply about talking more and louder; read chapter 2 to discover new ways of developing presence—let people know you are there! Learn how to control others’ perceptions of you by reading chapter 5. Bullying is never acceptable. If you think you’re being treated unfairly or being bullied, chapter 6 offers advice on dealing with your situation.

11–15: You have a balanced, assertive approach to your work and colleagues, which would be good to build upon. Develop your non-verbal communication and leadership skills (chapters 5 and 7) in order to hone your abilities and achieve your full potential.

16–21: You’re in danger of being aggressive and making enemies. Perhaps your behaviour stems from a lack of confidence in your abilities, and you’re overcompensating for this. Chapters 3 and 7 offer ideas for building confidence. Remember to communicate effectively by listening actively and mirroring your colleagues’ body language (chapters 2 and 4). You’re all working for the same side, so you don’t feel the need to compete for supremacy!